2 Mai 2013
... Yes indeed, Friday we are. I've just double-checked : yesterday was thursday, tomorrow will be saturday and if we look around, mess is really everywhere around the world (around the world, around the wohorld, around the world, around the wohorld etc...). Ask to Claude Guéant if it ain't a mess. It is. Ask to Thomas Fabius too and he'll reply the same thing. And from the horrible last song of Indochine (do you know their songs are used in Guantanamo to torture the last recalcitrant djihadists ?) to that gigantic duck in Hong Kong harbour supposed to be contemporary art (the worst kind), from a croatian goal-keeper found dead to Chris Kelly, a former rapper now, found dead too, from the new king of Holland to Hollande going down almost six feet under, we can easily think that the world's mess won't stop tomorrow. So this is why there's no reason the mess wouldn't be comfortable in its own home, right here on this blog. As i was these last days days in England, i decided that this friday mess would only be in Shakespeare's language, to have a try (this idea came from my cousin Florence which i thank for this idea and the nice supper, though i'm not sure i'll be able to take up that challenge). And as a starter, may i recommend you the works of that very fine malaysian artist named Red Hong Yi who adds every day since march 1st on her Instagram account a new creative plate made only with various ingredients as, for instance, this tiger made of carrots, white radish and prunes. No one knows if it's good but surely, it's looking good.
An owl made of shallots. Why ? Why not.
If you have a few cucumbers left, well, you could try to do the same. If you also have talent.
Beware of the giant Squid attack made from squid and squid ink. Nothing else.
This one doesn't need any explanations unless if you ask yourself who came first between egg and hen.
"All we need is love". Chopped basil, tomatoes and balsamic vinegar.
A dragon made with dragon fruit. I know, a bit easy.
Two Petronas towers from Singapore. With rice. And egg. And beans. And maybe bacon (but no Kevin).
Hokusai's wave made with a leaf and rice. That's nice.
The famous Warhol's Cambell's Tomato Soup made of ketchup, mayonnaise, mustard and oyster sauce.
A very special dedication to a well-known artist : Banksy. Made with nori (kind of algues) and apple (kind of fruit but i never eat any so i'm not sure about that. I must ask confirmation to my little Pakistanese down there in the cave).
And a few other one to open your appetite for art.
Better dead than red ? Well, Red doesn't seem to agree. Otherwise she wouldn't be standing but lying in a coffin (and it wouldn't have been the easiest way to take pictures of her creations of course).
But let's go on in this mess with something quite different as you can see. if you have any pets at home, please don't buy them these stuffs. It may be funny but it ain't. I really hope the Force will be with you to avoid purchasing these.
Unless you accept to be as hilarious as your dog and have a walk with him (if possible at night and very late as these are the worst Star Wars costumes i ever say - and i saw a few).
Anyway, let's go to the sunshine blues but first let's have a stop around a few nice ideas such as that anniversary candle cake which is not edible, moreover if the candle is lit. Then you could also have a look (but it's optional) to this great book to offer to your chatterbox friends, a nice scottish bar stool for kilt lovers, a great toilet seat to get stoned even in the toilets (please don't smoke it) and a great idea that changed that last dog's life into a kind of canine Steve Austin. We know we have the technology to rebuild him. He's the first six million dollar dog (hi Oscar Goldman).
Who fucking cares where's Charlie when you can play at where's Jacques Chirac ? Don't try to find Bernadette, she wasn't there (another yellow coins operation somewhere else in France).
This week, i had a crush on these fine girls but strangely, i cannot tell you why. If you have any idea, send it to to PA's brothel PO Box 178988985, Wichita, Kansas. I might answer. Or not.
As i told you, i was in London for a few days, hence this strange friday mess in english. As i saw a few nice things, i'd like to share them with you. I've tried to share them with my chair but it didn't work. So it's with you. If you don't want, it's your call but i just don't know why you are here and as i can't decide for you, do as you wish. It may be my blog here (and i do whatever i want with it, you know), it's you damn choice after all. So i saw a few Clashes, always smiling as usual.
I also saw (which it ain't easy to say quickly without spluttering) Pierre Perret in London and he told me open the bird's cage to let them fly as it looks really nice these little birds in the blue sky up there. So, kids, listen to me : if you ever see any emprisonned little birds, open them the door to freedom (and hunters ready to blow their heads just for pleasure).
Whate else ? A few nice roaring monsters. If crisis is worldwide, some places in London never heard of it.
So i had a try for SHAG, my art gallery here in Boulogne (link). Hey, you never know.
Another nice model. Think i saw hundreds of them in 4 days.
I saw an almost dead doe. Not John Doe. Just a doe. And an arrow. In the doe. Don't ask why, i have no idea.
Strangely, as i was roaming in London's streets, i ended up in Punjab which isn't quite honestly the next door. But i can tell it was a delicious journey. I still have my bottom teeth bathing (traduction approximative) just thinking again about it.
Mess it is, mess it remains. The chances of meeting Bernard "The Badger" Hinault, and Yannick "The Cloth" Noah, and The Greens with Michel Platini and Dominique Rocheteau and Eddie Merckx and Diego Maradona at the exact same place in London were really thin. But i succeeded. So we all had a beer together, we chatted and laughed and what a mess it was, not to say. Fuck, i said it.
I also saw a pink flamingo, Sherlock having a little fellatio... oups sorry, wrong translation, a little pipe, i've seen not only One but two and even Three Direction wich isn't easy to find your way in a foreign city.
And i can tell, as a burger lover, that i was not disappointed. At all. The Don is delicious.
I've seen advertising for... mormons. Frankly, who want to become a mormon ? Have you ever heard a child saying "Later, i'll be... a Mormon !". Moron, maybe. Mormon, never. Ever.
I saw kids playing leapfrog for eternity, not far from Zara Home (which i didn't visit, fortunately).
I saw Hoxton again, great suburb, changing, creating, mixt, trendy and popular. Please note i wasn't exactly here where it is written "You are here". I was one meter far. To be precise. Maybe 1 m 20, thinking about it. But let's not turn around the jar and haïdiho, carry on, lads. We have more bread to cut.
Quite a strange feeling, deflowering an never felt experience since i come here : i saw London under the sun. Can you believe it ? You cannot. But i assure you, it's the truth (pardon, j'ai postillonné sur l'écran). Here's a proof.
And another one for the most circumspects of you. Yes, i can see you there.
About art, this (what comes next, not what comes before, otherwise we won't find our way in this big mess) is one of the reasons of my coming to London. Big Dave's exhibition. I'm married to a Bowie fan. And she's tenacious. Not D but at least, B.
David Bowie's dick... sorry, queue. Argh, devilish Pakistaneses slaves, i'm gonna whip you.
I saw a nice english ass during the queuing (no relation between both). My wife agreed.
A great glass sculpture by Dale Chihuli.
I wanted to say something but... oups, i forgot. Never mind.
Just cannot find it again.
Hmmm, this is awkward.
Someday, i'll lose my head.
Pictures weren't allowed during David Bowie's exhibition. So, of course, i took a few. Just to share.
From there, i flew to Saatchi Gallery. I didn't fly litteraly. Beware, this was an understatement. I'm no Superman. I'm no Batman either. And if you'd ask yourself, i'm not even Bioman (hero of the universe).
It's not really a gallery in fact. It's more like a museum. A huuuuuuuge museum. 21 000 m square. It puts a slap as we say in my country. There was an excellent exhibition on contemporary russian artists going on.
Apart from Saatchi, i saw some Whils in the streets and another extraordinary exhibition, Sebastiao Salgado's "Genesis" at the National History Museum. Another big slap in the face.
It seems now to be time for a few Messages of Informative Nature that may be informative or may be not, it all depends where you stand, i.e if you stand on the back on your screen, you won't see them. But it's an example.
Thanks to CBCC
A beautiful message, above all. But no shrubbery.
And that's all for today unless you need more but there's none as i had no time to post these last days. Don't forget to like and share this friday mess, to tweet it (it is cute), to Linkedink it, to Google + it and to offer it to your friends but if and only if you liked that Friday mess. If no, don't. I wish you a pleasant friday under the sun, a great week-end and maybe see you next friday. If i want it.
Find all Friday messes wherever you want but it's a lot easier here : Le Bordel du Vendredi
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